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| Scenario: |
Kato Kaelin |
| Appeared: |
Website |
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July-August '99 |
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anklan |
| Hello and welcome to my web site.
The guy's from Mules & Vaughn asked me to do a selection for them.
Me, being locked up at the lovely Shady Palms Clinic was more than eager
to jump on the band wagon. Especially, if it got me out of dancing with
Steve, the midget who believe he's the star of Roots. Anyway, yes, it's
true. I have a hobby...and it is sticking things in my ass. Mules
& Vaughn approached me on doing it as a series for them. And
I thought, "hey, if Calista Flockhart can get a series...well then
so can I!" Anyway, before I tallied off there, the boys at
M&V have me rate what I have in my ass...so it back and read what I
do. And thanks...and if you can mail me a lovely soft pillow...that
would be great. |
| anklan |
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Love, Timmy
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| anklan |
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This Issue’s Featured Object:
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anklan
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fu |
Since getting the gig here at M&V,
I've been trying to give back to those less fortunate than I. Having said
that, I've opened my range to a larger amount of items I can "donate to
science" if you know what I mean...and I got an immediate reply from this
blonde from Brentwood. Not just any blonde...The Blonde From Brentwood,
Mr. Kaelin. When he stopped by, I was already buzzing from the KoolAid
and NyQuil mix I had just drinken...I mean, I have a cold, but I like my
drugs all pretty and tasty...so, I was quickly suckered into talking to
Kato...and here is a few things we talked about. By the way, before I continue,
did you know he did more things than lie about OJ, during his 15 minutes
of fame? |
anklan |
| His Current Job Status |
| Working on something with Yahoo
Serious and Morgan Fairchild |
| anklan |
| His Current Home |
| Not Available |
| anklan |
| Favorite Movie While Haven't
Leaving My "Suite" |
| Wild, Wild West |
| anklan |
| What He Liked Most About My "Suite" |
| The Shiny Blue Glass |
| anklan |
| Favorite Saying |
| Need A Roommate? |
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| His Current Goals |
| Get More From His Talk Soup
Residual Checks |
| anklan |
| His Current Future Plans For
Money |
| Write Another Article For Food |
| anklan |
| Most Annoying Thing He's Done
Since Coming Over Here |
| Has Talked About Him. Just Me Me
Me! |
| anklan |
| Biggest Brag |
| He Was On TV |
|
anklan |
| So, finally, I got him up into my
ass. He made himself right at home...and even began to take up residence.
I couldn't believe it! The guy rearranged my colon, tossed some things
around, added the Clapper, and he was here. Carrying him around was
rather revolting. Oh well...it's the things I do! What
pissed me off about the entire ordeal, is the fact he stayed for an extended
period of time. Usually, I insert things in my ass...and stayed nearly
3 months! You thought this was something I was bragging about...but
we started this interview session back in April! Argh...I'll have to flush
everything out, and start again new. |
| anklan |
| Pleasure Rating: 8 |
| Pain Rating: 2 |
| Pain is kind of Pleasurable Rating:
2 |
| anklan |
| Additional Comments: |
| I really can't put my finger on
which was worse, him moving into my colon...or the fact he hogged my bathroom.
Nevermind the fact he never paid for rent, and I've got long distance calls
up the ass(no pun or cleverly hidden humor on that statement...he actually
ran calls up into my ass and it costs me a lot). |
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